Dean Kaneda is our man!

• The demand for Mitch Kaneda is perfectly elastic. 
• Mitch Kaneda started this recession to remind you that Mitch giveth and Mitch taketh away. 
• Could Mitch Kaneda write a midterm so difficult that Mitch Kaneda couldn’t pass it? 
• Mitch Kaneda can pronounce the letter “R,” perfectly; it’s just scared of him. 
• Mitch Kaneda is willing to change unfair grades, but he never makes mistakes. 
• If you didn’t do the reading, it’s because Mitch Kaneda didn’t want you to. 
• Mitch Kaneda doesn’t understand the Prisoner’s Dilemma…he takes no prisoners. 
• Currency has value only because Mitch Kaneda believes in it. 
• Mitch Kaneda’s only weakness is karaoke. 
• Mitch Kaneda knows you’re sleeping in the back; did you know he’s sleeping with your girlfriend? 
• Mitch Kaneda does hold regular office hours—you just weren’t invited. 
• Mitch Kaneda managed to convince you that tariffs are inefficient so you wouldn’t be suspicious of his new car. 
• Mitch Kaneda once won a staring contest with the Mona Lisa. 
• John Nash wasn’t schizophrenic; Mitch Kaneda was just fucking with him. 
• Mitch Kaneda fucking hates matching pennies. 
• The Wall Street Journal reads itself to Mitch Kaneda. 
• The cover art for Econ textbooks comes from Mitch Kaneda’s dreams. 
• Mitch Kaneda could draw an indifference curve, but he just DOESN’T GIVE A F*#$. 
• Aren’t you glad Mitch Kaneda assigned that problem set so that you have something to do while he finishes up with your girlfriend? 
• Infant industries need protection because Mitch Kaneda is hungry. 
• Mitch Kaneda considers your mom a large open economy. 
• Put your hand down…Mitch Kaneda asks the motherfuckin’ questions around here. 
• Mitch Kaneda won two infinitely long games. 
• Mitch Kaneda once lost a Mitch Kaneda lookalike contest for being too good-looking. 
• Mitch Kaneda doesn’t have to give tests—he’s been testing you all along. 
• Mitch Kaneda doesn’t apply for grants; grants apply for him. 
• Mitch Kaneda has a Ph.D. in Kicking Ass.  And Economics. 
• Mitch Kaneda has never lost a game of Russian roulette. 
• Mitch Kaneda is always Pareto optimal.